Building self-esteem with support from a Friend
Child’s Name: Mia*
Age: 8
In Friends-KC since: 2008
Hobbies: Reading, cooking, drawing
Aspires To Be: A doctor
Friend (Mentor): Sheena
Mia comes from a family in crisis. When Mia came to the attention of Friends of the children, her mother spent little time with her due to a heavy six-day work schedule. Mia’s brother, who is not much older, usually filled the role of caretaker. After several reports to the state for child neglect, Child Protective Services began monitoring her family for safety and well-being.
Friend of the Children paired Mia with her Friend, Sheena, who immediately saw that Mia was extremely quiet and withdrawn. She avoided interaction with other children and only engaged her peers with anger and physical aggression. Not only was she challenged socially, she often missed school and was falling behind. Mia clearly needed the support of a caring adult to help her develop social, anger management and coping skills.
Near the end of 2008, Mia went to reside with her grandparents for a month, a situation that was much more stable and positive than when she lived with her mom. In late January 2009, she returned to her mother’s care and the difference was noticeable. Her clothes were usually dirty, she seemed to bathe less and she did not brush her teeth. A month later, CPS staff met to decide that Mia would be removed from her mother’s home. Mia’s father stepped up to take her brother, but he did not want Mia to live with him. Again, Mia was placed with her grandparents where she lived for the remainder of the school year.
Though she was sad that her father did not want to take her, the longer she stayed with her grandparents, the more her mood, behavior and attitude improved. She was getting more sleep, she was cleaner, and she was having regular meals. The consistency with her grandparents and a Friend made quite a difference in her life. She loved spending time with Sheena and wanted to see her all of the time.
To further support Mia, Sheena has spent countless hours in the classroom with her to support her in areas where she struggles. Each time Sheena enters the classroom, Mia’s face lights up with a big smile. She arrives to school on time now and is always prepared for class. She is able to read books on her own and loves sharing them with Sheena. Whether at school or at the Friends of the Children office, Mia likes to talk and play with her peers. She even volunteered to help another child with his homework. She smiles often and gives Sheena bear hugs each time they meet.
Recently abandoned by her mother again, Mia still grapples with an imperfect life, but Sheena has been an anchor and advocate throughout the transitions. Sheena provides vital support for Mia through thick and thin: she is present at CPS meetings, in touch with the grandparents, and in the classroom. Mia is so glad to finally have a true Friend.
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*the name of the child has been changed to protect his identity.